Wo Ai Zhong Guo

Emperor's New Clothes In Reverse

Hans Christian Andersen wrote a lovely story of an Emperor and his "invisible" clothes.  People would whisper and stare at the naked Emperor parading through the streets.

I feel like that sometimes when I walk around Shanghai, except that I am fully clothed.  I guess part of it is the Chinese culture of staring at others.  So when you walk into a busy restaurant, diners will stop eating and talking (if they were to begin with) and give each of the new arrivals a quick "once over" glance.  If there's a foreigner (lao wai) in your party of course, you will get a few more lingering glances.

But I often get theses stares just walking down the street.  Sometimes it's just idle, bored people who have nothing better to do.  But what gets me sometimes is when other GUYS see me approaching and almost stop to analyse what I'm wearing from top to bottom, then as I pass, they'll glance back to continue the fashion evaluation from the rear.  I rarely look back but can feel their eyes on me.

I guess it's because I don't dress the way most local men do, especially for work.  I don't wear golf shirts with black leather shoes and nylon, almost transparent, socks. I don't carry an underarm "man bag" either.  I do sometimes wear shoes that are not black as well as shirts that are not white or grey, and I do wear ties which are very rare in China.

So to these bewildered onlookers, I may as well be walking down the street naked!

Bund Bathing

I was browsing through Shopgirl's blog and found this video clip of a girl bathing naked on the Bund.  Mildly entertaining, especially the male police officer, trousers rolled up to the knees, trying to get a piece of the action!

Britain's Shame

A Chinese friend asked me last week if I feel homesick, especially as it's Chinese new year this week, the equivalent of Christmas in China, when everyone traditionally spends time with family.

Today I read in The Guardian about gun crime spiralling out of control in the UK with 3 teenagers have been killed in the last 11 days, the London congestion charge being extended west and almost doubling in size, and last week a report from Unicef (An Overview of Child Wellbeing in Rich Countries) rated Britain as the worst country (just below the USA!) out of the top 21 most developed countries for kids, with the highest level of drunkenness, obesity, bullying, early sexual intercourse, cannabis-taking, and teenage pregnancy.

Do I miss Britain?  In a word: no!

Regional Differences

Few of you will know I am a HUGE fan of NBC's TV series The West Wing which sadly, has now been cancelled after 7 amazing seasons.

I bought the first season a few years ago in HMV in Hong Kong, and now that I have watched all seven seasons, Ive decided to go back to the very first season and start all over again (yes, it is THAT good, trust me).  Imagine my horror when both my DVD players, one a Philips and one a local brand, BU BU GAO, refused to play these discs because they were region 2 discs and China has the dubious honour of being the only country with a regional code all to itself (region 6 if anyone is interested!).

The DVD region system was created to restrict software piracy, because of different movie release dates in different parts of the world.

But it is so ironic that I now need to go out into the streets of Shanghai to find a PIRATED version of the West Wing season one, so that I can enjoy it all over again because my legitimate original discs won't play here!

(Incidentally, the system is so well implemented that even my Apple Powerbook which I am using to write this blog will not let me play a region 2 disc, although it does give me the option to change my region to region 2 if I like.  I am reluctant though because you can only change region a limited number of times before it locks you out forever!).

So Gay

No Shanghai hasn't overtaken San Francisco as the gay capital of the world, but the number of Shanghai men carrying handbags is somewhat alarming.  I should explain that these aren't their own handbags but rather, their girlfriends' bags.  It's what I sometimes refer to as Shanghai princess syndrome.  Shanghai men are well known for doing everything - such as cooking, washing, cleaning, shopping - while their female counterparts do absolutely nothing except sit at home playing mah jong or go shopping.

And so it is that you will often see a Shanghai couple strolling down Huai Hai Road, the girl carrying absolutely nothing, hands in pockets, while the "man" will be galantly helping her to carry her handbag.

Now don't get me wrong, I am all for chivalry and I'll be the first to run to the aid of a damsel in distress, but PLEASE, these bags often contain no more than a hair brush and some lipstick, but the poor Shanghai girls still need to get help from their husband or boyfriend, who seems not only willing but proud to carry a bright pink or orange girlie bag as if to demonstrate how much of a man they are!

He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother

One of the things that irritate me about China is how people refer casually to people as their brother or sister when often there's in fact no family link between them whatsoever.  They do this in an attempt to indicate a sort of closeness to the person, beyond that of friendship I suppose, except that even this isn't strictly true and I've often discovered the "brother" is only a casual acquaintance.

And so it was today that a friend I was having dinner with mentioned she lives with her "ge ge" meaning "brother", and he doesn't like her to be out late.  Of course, I asked if it was her real brother and predictably, she said no.  I was so irritated by this that I informed her that anywhere except China, a brother is someone your mother has given birth to.  If he didn't come out of your mother's uterus, HE AIN'T YOUR BROTHER, OKAY???